Conversations between Mr Darcy and Ms Bennet
by The Silver Countess
Summary: Pretty much what the title says. Pride & Prejudice in modern times. Light fluff and the glorious fun of insulting Lady Catherine.


**Conversations between one Fitzwilliam Darcy and one Elizabeth Bennet in the 21****st**** Century**

* * *

><p>"Lizzie…"<p>

"No. Absolutely not."

"Eliza?'

"Maybe."

"Liz?"

"Urgh! Heck no!"

"How 'bout –"

"Will. Baby, I know you love me but you need to stop coming up with my nicknames to name our daughter."

" … How about Bennet?"

"Or my last name for our son."

* * *

><p>"I HATE YOU!"<p>

"I LOATHE YOU!"

"You are so INFURIATING!"

"And you're MADDENING!"

"…"

"…"

"Fine then."

"You look sexy in that dress."

"I look sexy in whatever I wear."

"Can't we -"

"No. We are going to that party Will, even if I have to drag you there."

"I bought you underwear."

" … I guess no one will miss us."

* * *

><p>"I know I was an idiot."<p>

"…"

"Alright, I was a prick, a bastard and I ought to be castrated."

"Yes, you should."

"Lizzie, please. I'm sorry. I swear to God I didn't mean it."

"I don't believe you."

"I'll prove it. Whatever you want me to do, I'll do it. Just, please, don't be mad at me anymore."

"…"

"I'm gonna regret this aren't I?"

"Probably."

~A while later~

"I have the most manipulative girlfriend in the world."

"And you love me for it."

"I must be mad."

"Watch it, Darcy, or I'll make you do it again."

* * *

><p>"Well, it seems I was mistaken. I'll, um… just get out of your hair now."<p>

"Lizzie! Wait, just let me explain, please."

"No! It was obviously a mistake to come. 'Bye Will."

"Wait, I –"

"…"

"…"

"… Wow."

"Yeah. So… how about that date, before I get more carried away?"

* * *

><p>"You know… I know of a job vacancy right now."<p>

"Really?"

"Yeah. You don't have to do much, maybe some paperwork occasionally and taking children for a walk once in a while. $10,000 a month."

"Who on earth pays $10,000 for a nanny?"

"That would be me, Lizzie. And it's not a nanny's job I'm offering.

"Then what is it?"

"I'm offering the job of Mrs Darcy."

"…"

"… Lizzie? Babe, you okay? Talk to me, please."

"…"

"Sweetheart, I know it's a little abrupt, but–"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"If that's the reaction I get for proposing, I'll propose every day, love."

* * *

><p>"Baby, please. Be sensible."<p>

"I am being sensible. I'm being logical to the damn boot!"

"Will, please. Act your age."

"If acting my age means letting my pregnant wife walk down the stairs then I'll most definitely act NOT my age."

"You know, you're very protective considering I'm supposed to be the hormonal one."

"…"

"Will! Put me down NOW!"

"…"

"FITZWILLIAM DARCY! I SWEAR IF YOU DON'T PUT ME DOWN NOW–"

"See, you are hormonal."

"…"

"Ouch! Dammit! What'd you do that for?"

"You deserve it for calling me hormonal."

* * *

><p>"Name your five favourite things to do when we're together."<p>

"Kissing you."

"Flatterer. Next?"

"Holding you in my arms"

"Aren't you a sweet talker? Next"

"Waking next to you."

"And cheesy too."

"I love hearing you talk."

"That sounds familiar…"

"I love you."

"That too, but I remember asking you for things to DO. But… I'll forgive you if you kiss me…"

"Deal."

* * *

><p>"So…"<p>

"So…"

"What's up?"

"Um… nothing much really.

"Really."

"Yeah. Really."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Okay, this is so awkward."

"I absolutely agree."

"Look, I… um… I kinda like you."

"I love you."

"…"

"Dammit. I'm sorry. I didn't mean for that to slip out and now everything is rushed and ruined and it's my stupid fault again and I–"

"Will."

"Yeah?'

"I love you, too."

* * *

><p>"You know, I've never liked that shirt."<p>

"Then we can throw it away."

"No."

"Why not? You said didn't like it."

"Since it's from Aunt Catherine–"

"Okay, we're burning the shirt."

"That's what I thought."

* * *

><p>"Will?"<p>

"Hm?"

"Do you think I'm fat?"

"…"

"Will?"

"Um… I… uh… um… I…"

"Will, I'm just pulling your leg."

"Oh, thank God."

"But really though, do you think I'm fat?

"… Is this a trick question?"

"No."

~a while later~

"Damn, that woman can punch."

* * *

><p>"Sweetheart, that's the ninth dress you've tried on."<p>

"As you can see, I've yet to find the perfect dress."

"You looked beautiful in the last eight dresses, you know."

"…"

"Lizzie, c'mon. I'm starving."

"Men never understand anything."

"That's because we value our stomachs more than dresses."

"True. That's why we females are more sensible, since men let their stomachs do their thinking instead of their minds."

"What?"

"Exactly my point."

* * *

><p>"I love you."<p>

"I know."

"See, I'm not the only one with pride issues."

"Do you miss sleeping on the couch or something?"

"Of course not. I love you."

"Love you too."

* * *

><p>"Will, do you love me?"<p>

"Yes I do… why?"

"…"

"Lizzie… just tell me what it is."

"I feel like having caramel ice-cream."

"At 2am? Oh, dear God."

"If it makes you feel better, I love you too."

* * *

><p>~the end<p>

A/N: So... I hope you like this! Review please. I'd like to hear what you think of this :)


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